High Fashionable

January 2, 2012

Driving in the car.

Eli (age 5): Henry, you know what I don’t get about grown-ups? How come grown-ups are so hi[mumble].

Julie: What? How come grown-ups are so hyper?

Eli: No. How come grown-ups are so high fashionable?

Dave: What?

Julie: You mean like me and Dave? We’re so high fashionable?

Eli: No, I mean all grown-ups.

Julie: But also me and Dave.

Eli: No. You two are the least high fashionable grown-ups there are.

Julie: What? We’re high fashionable! Wait, what do you even mean? Ok, what could I do to be more high fashionable?

Eli: You could wear lipstick and polish your nails.

Julie: Um.

Eli: And wear a big poufy dress and high heels and no hats.

Julie: Uh-huh.

Henry (age 8): And necklaces and bracelets and earrings!

Julie: I’m wearing earrings!

Eli: Yeah, you should wear necklaces and bracelets too, though. And what’s that stuff you put on your eyes?

Julie: Eyeshadow?

Eli: Yeah. You should wear eyeshadow.

Julie: Ok, ok. What about Dave? How could he be more high fashionable?

Eli: He should wear black pants, a black shirt, a necktie, and dancing shoes. And a top hat.

Julie: So you’re supposed to look like Fred Astaire, Dave.

Dave: What you’re saying is, Julie and I should go out dancing by ourselves more often, and you all should stay home with a babysitter.

[Kids all cheer.]

Henry: [thoughtfully] And the way you could be more high fashionable at a museum would be to wear a dinosaur costume.

[Eli looks at Henry disdainfully, and with pity.]

Eli: When you go out dancing, Julie, you should make sure your dress is really poufy.

(11)

11 Responses to “High Fashionable”

  1. Sylvie says:

    Where do they see these high fashionable people may I ask??? I love the recommendation for Dave, which is the least Dave outfit I can think of.

  2. Julie says:

    I guess getting that New York Times subscription has paid off. He must be scouring the Style section. Because he’s not getting these tips from Eating Well.

  3. Hannah says:

    LOL! Yes be sure your dress is poufy. Also make sure the year is 1985.

  4. Julie says:

    1985 was kind of a good year for me. So, maybe. Someone on Facebook said it sounds more like Pretty in Pink than a Fred Astaire movie, and I think that’s maybe (sadly?) a more realistic view of my fashion style.

  5. susan says:

    We should ALL wear poufy dresses in 2012! Doesn’t this just make you wonder even more what life’s got in store for Eli? High fashionable Ruler of the World!

  6. Hysterical! I love the age my boys are now (22 months), but I’m also really looking forward to awesome conversations like that one!

  7. emily says:

    i love the thought of “going out dancing”. Like, where? I live in NYC and I don’t know where. I mean, I could find it, but..I love the potentially really glamorous life we lead in their heads!

  8. Katie Davis says:

    This is a picture book, Julie! Get to it!

  9. Julie says:

    Yeah, Em, I really would have no idea. It would probably mean going out for coffee and dancing for joy at being able to finish our sentences without interruption.

    Katie, I’m going to write up an over-written 2,000-word picture book from this and make you read it.

  10. Who is your stenographer???

    Happy to babysit any time you dress up in heels, “poufy” dress and Dave dons his taps. But seriously, Brian has a dinosaur costume you can wear, or was that supposed to be part of Dave’s gear, or was it one of those two “man” costumes that one person bends over to be the rear end of? That would sort of minimize the visibility of your poufy dress. Well, our dinosaur costume is very ho-hum and has strictly two legs, but I’m sure it could be altered. Oh yeah, we have a top hat too. (Yes, it’s very glamorous over here…)

  11. Julie says:

    Adriane, since I don’t have a cell phone, my hands are free to take notes while I’m driving.

    We may borrow your top hat. But do you have DANCING SHOES?

Leave a Reply

CATEGORIES: Eli