Henry is 6 today. It’s so strange to look at your kid, your little kid, who was just a baby the other day, and to see the adult that he’ll become. A huge part of me can’t even grasp the concept, but I’m also wildly curious, and can’t stop myself from looking at them to see the future adult. Sometimes they’ll give a look where I can see the glimmer, or sometimes when they’re sleeping I can see it, and I see behind the baby cheeks who they will be at 15…at 24…at 30. With Henry I see it more and more, with Eli mostly when he stares into my face with such tenderness and fierceness that it always stops me cold. In Zuzu I haven’t really caught it yet; she’s still such a baby. Though she does look a lot like my mom, so I can extrapolate forward thusly.
I can’t help myself from trying to imagine who they will be in their future selves, and I also can’t imagine a future where I don’t want to hold them in my lap and chew on them a bit.