What my children think about me having an agent

I HAVE NOT STOPPED SHOUTING ABOUT THE FACT THAT I HAVE AN AGENT! AND I AM EXCITED!

My kids are not impressed.

Me: Guys! I have an agent!

Them: So you have a book published?

Me: No. It’s different. You’ll know when I get a book published. Plus there will, you know, be a book.

Them: Oh, right. What’s for dinner?

Me: I don’t know.

Dave, yelling from bathroom construction upstairs: I got stuff to make French Bread Pizzas!

Kids: Nooooo! We hate French Bread Pizza!

Me: Are you serious? What kind of kid hates French Bread Pizza? I can make you tempeh….

Kids: Nooooo!

Kids walk away, sobbing.

Me, to no one: I have an agent!

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